- Texas is neither southern nor western. Texas is Texas.
- If I owned Texas and Hell, I would rent Texas and live in Hell.
- If English was good enough for Jesus Christ, it ought to be good enough for the children of Texas.
- I support gay marriage. I believe they have a right to be as miserable as the rest of us.
- Happiness is a moving target.
- Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.
- If you don’t love Jesus, go to hell!
- If you have the choice between humble and cocky, go with cocky. There’s always time to be humble later, once you’ve been proven horrendously, irrevocably wrong.
- I am not anti-death penalty, but I’m damn sure anti-the-wrong-guy-getting-executed.
- Well, I hate to be the one to take the flyswatter to Tinker Bell, but . . .
- There’s a fine line between fiction and non-fiction and I think I snorted it somewhere in 1979.
The Democrats and Republicans are the same guy admiring themself in the mirror.